I feel like Psalm 13 speaks greatly to this season of my (and Michael's) life right now. I heard it in a bible study I went to and couldn't believe how much it expressed what I have been feeling.
I know God has wanted us here in Redwood City but God definitely took/is taking his time in showing us how exactly he is going to use us here. I love that it says, "restore the sparkle to my eyes." I can't tell you how many people have described me a sparkler, bubbly, bright, etc. But it's been so hard. It's like this ongoing battle to keep trying to trust that God has a plan for us here and that he will take care of that cell phone bill even though we totally don't have money for that. Or that God will pay for the tires that Michael needs on his car even though we don't have an extra $400 lying around. Or that God will provide a job for me in the Spring.
But at the same time, this season has been so sweet because I have seen God work through and grow Michael and me in ways I haven't before. Since we don't really have anything else, we have been forced to rely on God and it's so awesome how he has provided every bill and every need. Like the random check from a year ago that I found in the shed from Michael's last job that payed for the cell phone bill. Or the $400 in christmas money we got to pay for Michael's tires. Or the job that God provided for me in the spring so that I can continue to work at King's not only teaching math but also teaching health to 8th grade girls.
After connecting with a lot of the 8th grade girls this semester in Geometry, I felt a little sad that I wasn't going to see them again. But now I not only get to see them, but I get to teach/discuss how they are beautifully and uniquely made in His image and can be confident and claim that truth! So awesome! What a blessing!
It is just so sweet how God has taken care of every step of the way and I can now claim His promises in confidence. I love that during this harder time in our lives that our "roots are going deep" (as my friend Helen puts it) and that we will come out of this with such a strong confidence for future hard times and could possibly help encourage others facing the same struggles.
Psalm 13
For the choir director: A psalm of David.
1 O Lord, how long will you forget me? Forever?
How long will you look the other way?
2 How long must I struggle with anguish in my soul,
with sorrow in my heart every day?
How long will my enemy have the upper hand?
3 Turn and answer me, O Lord my God!
Restore the sparkle to my eyes, or I will die.
4 Don’t let my enemies gloat, saying, “We have defeated him!”
Don’t let them rejoice at my downfall.
5 But I trust in your unfailing love.
I will rejoice because you have rescued me.
6 I will sing to the Lord
because he is good to me.
As a fun sidenote:
For Christmas Michael got me a necklace that has two hearts on it. One side of one heart says "love, Michael" and the other side says "Psalm 13". So sweet! Then he said that he got a free jewelry box with it and they told him they can engrave something on it. So on top of the box it says, "Real Fancy". SO AWESOME! I love it.
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